Aries – Mar 21 – Apr 19 You cannot be responsible for the welfare of everybody, especially when you cannot be responsible for your own welfare.
Taurus – Apr 20 – May 20 You may feel grounded, but it is better to keep your mouth shut and avoid the bull.
Gemini – May 21 – Jun 20 Going to a new place can be disconcerting. If anything seems weird, you just bust out of there.
Cancer – Jun 21 – July 22 You and secrets – this one is important. It must not get out; don’t let it out.
Leo – July 23 – Aug 22 You know you’re going to get fired if you do that. If this is your dream job, you may want to reconsider what you are going to do.
Virgo – Aug 23 – Sep 22 Are you clean? You better be.
Libra – Sep 23 – Oct 22 On the balance of it all, you did the right thing. You’re doing him a favor.
Scorpio – Oct 23 – Nov 21 There is a very small margin for error. You better hope that nothing goes wrong.
Sagittarius – Nov 22 – Dec 21 Go get your bag. Travel is on the horizon. Even a day trip could be just what you need.
Capricorn – Dec 22 – Jan 19 Sometimes, asking “Why is this happening?” just isn’t helpful. There may be no reason. Get through the crisis and see how it can be averted afterwards.
Aquarius – Jan 20 – Feb 18 You can’t stop it, so you might as well enjoy the ride.
Pisces – Feb 19 – Mar 20 You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to. It’s all good whatever you choose.
Horrorscope is a parody meant for entertainment only proving that the universe doesn’t revolve around you. “The Globe” denies any resemblance to anything living or dead. Fear has a season; never wear the goat mask.