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Home Opinion From the Archives: Ye olde review of fun: Hoop rolling
  • Opinion

From the Archives: Ye olde review of fun: Hoop rolling

By
April Fools
-
April 3, 2013
0

Editor’s Note: This fictional article, which uses a vintage writing style for the period, was written as a contribution to The Globe’s April Fool’s Day commemorative issue designed by Shad Engkilterra. This article is for entertainment purposes only.

Heaping Fun!

In these Times of Expansion and Work, unsupervised Children can cause harm to themselves and others without Reason. There is a Way to keep these Children behaved and entertained.

The Answer comes to us from our overseas Allies of England in the Form of Hoop Rolling. Hoop Rolling is a Game that will keep the Children active and entertained. It is an Activity ultimately not of the Devil.

Hoop Rolling consists of rolling a Hoop made of Wood or Metal and keeping it in motion for as long as possible. Children and young Men can play together by challenging each other to Races or seeing who can keep his Hoop rolling for the longest period of Time.

Rolling the Hoop is done by hitting the Hoop with a wooden Stick to add Momentum. Players must be precise with their Strikes; if not, the Hoop swerves to the Side and falls requiring that it must be set up to begin rolling once again.

The quality of the Hoop is dependent of the amount of Money you invest. A wooden Hoop is of good quality, but susceptible to damage and termites. If you find that you have the Wealth to purchase a metal Hoop, you will find that the Hoops are of a greater Quality with greater Durability and Heft to weigh the Hooping and keeping it from bouncing too much.

The Hoop and Stick is a game with a high and mighty Level of Replayability. Practice is encouraged in order to master the Balance and Speed aspects of challenging others. A safe Game, as long as Children stay away from moving Carriages, Hoop Rolling will keep your Child active, focused and out of the grips of the Devil.

This humble Worker gives the Hoop and Stick four Mighty Steeds out of five.

  • TAGS
  • April Fools Article
  • From the Archives
  • Hoop Rolling
  • Stick and Hoop
April Fools

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