
It has recently been discovered that Salt Lake Community College has the largest gold reserve in all of the United States. Students have been finding gold ranging from flakes on tree trunks to five pound nuggets disguised as rocks.
People may wonder, how did this gold get here. Turns out that SLCC is home to a spirit or entity that is the cause of all the ‘lost’ treasures throughout southwest history and now the treasures in the form of gold are reappearing on all of the schools campuses.
There is a legend in Utah history that there are spirits that are just like Robin Hood. Except these spirits steal from thieves and give to regular people. The spirit roaming SLCC’s campuses is quite unique itself.
In the late 1700s there was a girl, Sally Sticky Fingers, who was dubbed the ‘Gold Giver.’ She would steal from all the major gold carriers and give it to her classmates. When she was caught stealing the loot of miners and treasure hunters she was sentenced to be forever imprisoned in a cave somewhere in the Moab area.
Now since time has passed, weathering and erosion have opened the cave and her spirit has now run free and she is giving the gold that she has stolen to the students of SLCC. We can call her our modern day Robin Hood maiden.
Every April 1, students will see her spirit and will then find any amount of gold in a random spot during their day.
If you have seen the Giver’s spirit then you can be assured that you have been left some gold. Anyone who has seen Sticky Fingers in the course of their day, she has left them some gold.
One student just recently found Jesse James’ treasure chest from his last heist, reeling in a total of ten pounds in American gold coins.
Student Jane Doe says that, “I’m quitting school and going to travel abroad with this chest and sell each coin to the highest bidder.”
Another student, Bam Bam, was even more ecstatic, “BAM! BAM! BAM!” He will be molding a golden club to show off to his peers with all of the gold rocks that the spirit gave to him.
But why does Sally go around giving gold to people? Who cares. If someone gave you a diamond do you question it? No, just say thank you and do with it what you will. There is no need to question generosity.
Happy April Fools.